Be a weed.

Being a weed.
Hugh? Something to ponder.
If you knew the guy that 'Shared' this, your first thought, immediately, drug related.  But it's not is it ? Or.... is it.

NO, no, it is not. True some Bohemian chick in Temecula, CA thought it up while smoking Mary. !Reicher! Mary Jane, Reefer, Cush. Dude, your mind is always in the gutter.https:

But, back to my thoughts and insights.
I knew a lot of "Pot Heads"  in school. A lot ! We mostly turned out well. The ones' gone didn't die from being a "Pot Head".

I also knew a lot of "Arrows" who strolled the straight rows. They mostly turned out well. The ones' gone Blah, Blah, Blah. You get the point.

But as I look at my  friends list I can easily tell the "Weeds" from the Rows".

I will never pigeon hole anyone. Their are a few crossovers. 20% max.

I'm happy for the 10% that became "Weeds". Sad for the others.

I guess 7.4% are trying their  damnedest to be "Weeds" but have to wait until they retire.Hell, Jim's already made it. Maintenance provided digs. Doesn't even have to mow his yard. His little bro though is still a "Row".

My lovely and brave wife was a "Weed" in "Row"s clothing. I drug her into the "Weeds". She is only a "Row" on Sunday. STOP! That's a lie. Our church is a "Weed".  That's why she goes. She is a "Weed" and I think she is glad.

My 3 kids are 2 "Weeds" and one "Row". But that's cool. She married a "Weed" and he is dragging her into the "Weeds". Their boys will grow up to be "Weeds". "Weeds" that poke dead things with sticks and kill animals because their other GPa is a "Row". Barely. He tries his hardest, bless his heart but he can't quite get there. I know for a fact Dan has raised at least 1 "Weed" maybe 2.

My little brothers are in a different spot. Never really "Pot Heads" But we are all three different rows. Kinda.

People call us the "Rev" the "Red" and the "Reb".

The "Rev", he kinda walks the edge. Hello, they call him "The Rev" for a reason. He does well, he is very good at what he does. He takes his congregation into the weeds.

The "Red". He want's to be a "Weed", he even loves Willie and Waylon and The Boys. He is a honest to God make Laura proud redneck. (FYI, I'm not positive but I think Laura is a "Weed".)

He want's so hard to be a "Row" but can't quite get there. He walks catty wompous (Spell Check can't fix that). at kind of an angle. He tries to be a weed, he just can't and messes up the "Rows". But that's cool, that's what he want's.

In conclusion, I'm a "Weed" and we all should be "Weeds".

But if you don't want to be. That's cool.


Disclaimer: This a totally mythical Blog. All similarities to people real or imaginary was purely a coincidence. If you have a problem with being a coincidence and this "Weed" may or may not care. That's a lie. I will care.























eing a weed?

Man I love Wednsdays.

 

This time of year I'm pretty dang busy. I mean busy.

Lot's of hours lots of owies bloody knuckles and such.  But Wednesday is my Friday.

I stay up late, enjoy the back porch, the radio and baseball and stay up way to late. Occasionally a fire but never alone. I may drink alone but no fires. 

Sharon has rules. Ace, fire and beer after a 10 hr workday can be trouble.

Never has been before, but, there's always a first. 

Sharon is working so she will be in bed way before I am. Before this new job of hers we would hang together on the porch. Lately, I've been hanging around the kitchen table with my son and his friends. FYI If you come to my house to just hang out we will be sitting around the kitchen table or a fire in back. Ironically one of my hobbies is burning old wooden kitchen chairs in my fires. I also have burnt an old wooden ladder or two. . It's quite possible I haven't sat on my couch in 5 years.

It's very enjoyable to sit and have intellectual discussions with young adults. If you haven't done it for awhile give it a try. Eventually I will wander inside and watch a movie or finish the Sunday paper. I can do anything I want, all night if I want, and sleep all day on Thursday.

Thursday is my favorite day of the week.

Joys and sorrow's of parenthood. A parent should never have to bury a child.

The last few days have shown me the highs and lows of being a parent.

Yesterday Sharon and I had the honor of attending a candle light memorial service in honor of Abbey Espinoza.

Abbey was a beautiful 13 year old who took her own life because of something some people posted on that box sitting rite in front of you. The box was slower then but had the same impact.

As Henry spoke I had very conflicted feelings.
My oldest daughter had a child born dead a few years back full term. Born dead.
She went to the hospital in labor. Dr. said "Rachael, this is going to take a while. Go home and try to get some sleep and we will have a baby in the morning"

The so happy to soon be parents arrived at the hospital  the next morning and 'they' couldn't find a heartbeat. Aurora had passed in the still of the night.

Rachael and Tim were devastated just as much as Michelle and Henry.
But the thoughts racing through my mind were intense.
We're Henry and Michelle the blessed ones? Were Tim and Rachael?

It was obvious by the crowd Abbey impacted many lives in her short journey. But her parents got the joy of knowing her heart and soul. To hear her laugh, to hear her cry. To kiss her knee and spank her butt.
They also have to remember a funeral and burial.

Would Tim and Rachael preferred to have 13 years with Aurora if they knew the price at the end. Or was it a blessing to never meet Aurora? To never have the memories of her laughing, crying, kissing knees and spanking butts. Tim and Rachael also had a funeral and a burial to remember.

Wow. Side bar. You weren't expecting such tough questions from Ace. Admit it.

But there is joy.
My buddy Kenny was there with his boys. I know he was touched to be with his boys and he feels joy for them being in his life. They were impacted by Abbey and never had even met her.

Henry and Michelle have two sweet kids. Well maybe not the boy. He is in that 15 year pain in the ass stage. Sarah the youngest is as sweet and caring and joyous child I have met in a long time.
I hope most days Henry and Michelle don't think about Abbey.

Tim and Rachael have two cute as hell little boys now. Newborn and 2. I LIKE 'EM ! They just bought their first house and are happy. I hope they don't remember Aurora every day.

This parent has never had to experience burying a child. Dads, grandparents and such yes, but never a child.

I've got to see my kids all grow to be happy adults.
And I saw Jimmy Buffett Saturday.

Important breaking news.

Phone ringing. Mom's house to my cell.
Ace, "Mom, cell to cell, house to house!"

Mom "It's OK you are probably OK on minutes. My friend from church son has a friend that is having trouble with his John Deere. I gave him your number. I knew you could use the extra money"

I love my mom.

I bleed green, Peter Eaton and the Coach #2.

OK now about "The Coach" yep that coach. And my father -in-law. "The Coach" is not my father-in-law.

Both are great men. They have have embedded many men with morals and values that they don't even realize.

That being said they are a little OCD about their yards. Gentlemen, it's grass. It will still be there tomorrow.

First 'The Coach', started something like this.
PA at work, "Paul Clouse" line 3." First off I never get paged with my last name at work unless it is the IRS or a bill collector. Wasn't looking forward to picking up the phone.

Ace, "This is Paul."
'The Coach' "Hey Paul, this Coach". Suck seriously, I was hoping for the IRS. "I broke the bolt holding my wheel on my mower and am going out of town Thursday. I have one strip left to mow and I don't want to have to rent or borrow my son's mower to mow that strip"
First off 'The Coach' has a perfect yard and mows, and bags, twice a week. That one last strip would survive.
Ace," I can probably fix it while you wait if you drop by my house about 6:00."
Coach, " How much will this cost?"
Ace, "Hell if I know, I can't see it from here." First off what did it matter. If you are so OCD about your 1 strip of lawn that you would rent a mower it really doesn't matter.
 Coach' "See ya at 6:00" I could have set my alarm, knock on door at exactly 6. I met him at the garage with my arms spread as the automated door rose and 'Sprach Zarathrusta' played on my stereo. It's kind of a cool effect.

OK Coach lets check it out. He had his son in tow who needed help loading his trimmer head.
Now we are up to 2 repairs after 6 on a day that I just worked 10 hrs on lawn equipment.

Ace, "Putting string in the trimmer is a piece of cake". Took 1 minute. 

Ace, "Let's see what you broke"

5 minute repair, 2 jobs in and out the door in 6 minutes.

Coach, "What do I owe you?"

Ace' "10 bucks"

Coach, "Do you have change for a 20?"

Seriously coach? The son then took charge. "Dad, seriously! Let him keep the change."

I bleed green, Peter Eaton and "The Coach"

Good or bad I bleed green, not Poulan green or MTD green but John Deere green.

The funny thing is I bleed green in November and December also. Heck, January and February too.

Question is why didn't you bring your tractor that died on the last mowing last year to me when I could have really used the money?

Today was a classic tale of two customers and the 'race card'.

Customer 1 arrived 1 minute in front of #2. It takes me about 4 minutes to write up a service ticket.

Ace to customer 1, "Since you brought your mower in for "The Winter Service Special", (25% off labor November through Feb) I can get you in and out in about 5 days"
Customer #1, (who's name is Peter Eaton, I kid you not, Peter Eaton) " Awesome Paul, I love the service I get here."

Now comes customer #2. he had been standing there the entire time I was talking to Peter Eaton, I know, What were his parents thinking.
He had the exact same problem as Peter Eaton. Never been in my store in his life, bought his tractor from Home Depot, and was mid 30's black man driving a Mercedes SUV.

Paul, "I'm guessing you are looking at about 6 weeks repair time."

I swear on a stack of bibles the first words out of his mouth were "I can't believe the racist treatment at this place, Trust me I will tell everyone I know"

Ace, "I'm sorry you feel that way sir, Peter (say it in your head) has been a customer for 20 years who participated in our "Winter Service Program."

Customer #2, "I am also at least a 10 year customer, this is the second John Deere tractor I have purchased at Home Depot"

Ace," I'm sorry sir, I don't work for Home Depot, I work for a private company that just happens to sell  John Deere tractors for the same price as Home Depot and we offer 1 week turn around for our customers".

That really set him off. "I want to talk to your boss, your job could be in jeopardy for talking to me like that"

Wrong move customer #2. The 2 brothers I work for only drive by Home Depot because they have to. 
About 2 minutes later he comes back through the door.

"I'm calling 'Action 4 News'. Expect a call"

LOL I get calls from 'Action 4 News' 3 times a month asking me if the other guys are screwing people. Gary Lezak is my best customer. I testify in court for Briggs and Stratton twice a year. My rep is pretty solid.

Customer 2 left pissed and his tractor rolled back and fell off the trailer on Shawnee Mission Parkway. Lucky for him it rolled into a Shawnee police car, Karma is a bitch.

Wow that was long. Stay tuned for part 2. We will Get to "The Coach" tomorrow.

Time Warner Cable.

I know, starting to be a running theme but I have to vent.

20 minutes on hold to finally get to someone on American soil, first words out of his mouth,"Please unplug all devices and reboot for a proper evaluation"  Hello..... idiot, not my first day on the internet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tier 3 support, after 40 minutes in India  told me to reboot, well to my awe and amazement that didn't work. Tech said, "let me run my own speed check". "Cool dude check it out".

"Mr. Clouse, your contract says up to 1 meg upload and you are getting .320 that's not over 1."

Seriously!

2 bucks, vs 50

Crazy day today. Stopped at the locale QT for fuel at lunch.
Lady shoved me out of the way at the cash register to pre-pay for fuel. I was in no hurry, what ever lady you obviously are in a bigger hurry than me.
Pushy Lady, "Give me 2.00. "
Ace, "be sure to buy mid grade if it's for your mower".
Pushy Lady, "Pffttt, Whatever."

Got to the pump to put 50 in my car. Pushy Lady was pumping 2.00 into her Escalade.
LOL

Mom, taxes and such.

Let me start by saying I truly love my mother. Seriously, I do.......but some days..........

Cell phone ringing on the way from work. 6:30. It's mom calling from her house phone.
Ace; "Hello"
Mom; "Are you driving"
Ace; "Yes"
Mom; "I need to print my taxes and the computer says the printer is off line".
Ace; "I'll stop by after work"

Now first off I'm on the same Sprint account as my mom so our person to person minutes are free. Alas, she still hasn't grasped that. She calls my house from her cell and my cell from her house.
Secondly, "are you driving"? Of course I'm driving, I have worked 8-6 Monday-Friday for 20+ years.

Printer was indeed Off-line. Pretty hard to be on-line if you aren't plugged in.
So I plug in the printer and nothing, printer dead.

Now we have a new dilemma.
 Mom; Can we print them somewhere else?"
  Ace "I don't know where are they at"
Mom; They are on the computer"
Ace' "Little more specific, that's a pretty big place"
Mom, "Tax-act, we used Tax-act "  Now we are starting to make some progress.
Ace;" Do you know your user name and password?"
Mom, "Yes, I have it written down"
Ace, '"Sure mom, no problem then. I can print them at my house"

Now is when the fun kicks in. FYI to all my friends an underscore is not the same as a minus sign in your password.

Sweet, got it under control now. I physically am now looking at her taxes, on my brand new computer, in a PDF file. This is a done deal.
LOL, Error message, suck! My Adobe is to new. Sooo..... still there? I break out the old computer, 9 speedy minutes later I am once again staring a PDF face to face. Print button pushed. Suck....error message, out of ink.

Back in the car and off to CVS for ink. I did have a coupon for 18.50 on  any regular priced item. Suck, again. Ink was on sale.

To make a long story short. My mom taxes are printed.

I love my mom.

Naps

I hated them as a kid!
Today,not so much,

After glow

It's crazy, Ace rocks hard but 2 AM landing at home? Seriously.
Had a blast with great friends. Drank more than I should but WTH. I can sleep all day.
As you can tell I'm not sleeping all day. Must be getting old.
I had absolutely nothing to do today but sleep. But alas, I'm up. What shall I do? Take a nap?